a framework for forming men

Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.
Genesis 2:7

"The most important thing in your life is not what you do; 
it’s who you become. That’s what you will take into eternity." 
Dallas Willard

You won’t become the man God wants you to be by accident. 
You won’t develop your redemptive potential passively. 
You don’t live in a neutral world; you live in heavily contested space.
You are being formed by something, into someone.

Are you aware of what those forces are, and who you are becoming?

We are all consciously and unconsciously moving toward a model of what a man is supposed to be. Stereotypes abound. Does a man like trucks, sports, and beer? Or is a man emotionally vulnerable, gentle, and kind. Does a man lift weights and hunt, or does a man think deeply, sit quietly, and draw? This debate has turned into a culture war. Stereotypes are often calcified, sides are drawn, and preferences are moralized. 

Most of this is a distraction. As a follower of Jesus, the vision of what you are called to become is not defined by stereotypes, scripts, or strong opinions. 

You are called to become like Jesus.

So how can you wake up and understand the ways you are being formed and intentionally pursue formation in the way of Jesus? 

Over the next 5 weeks, I am going to explore a pathway of spiritual formation for men. We are going to cover:

FORMATION
DEFORMATION
COUNTERFORMATION
TRANSFORMATION
CONFORMATION

Today, I’ll share a few thoughts on formation. 

FORMATION 

My dear children, for whom I am again in the pains of childbirth until Christ is formed in you…
Galatians 4:19

The world has a vision for you as a man.
The world wants you to be a greedy, unrestrained, anxious consumer. Addicted to dopamine rewards through trivial pursuits. 

Satan has a vision for you as a man.
The enemy wants you to be a selfish man fixated on entitlement, victimhood, selfishness, success, sex, pleasure, and power.

Jesus has a vision for you as a man.
He wants you to be a godly, passionate, life-giving man.

The great goal of your faith is not to fulfill the world's idea of manliness, perform religious duties to earn favor with God, or pick culturally driven fights in the systems of the world.
The one consuming goal of your life is to be formed into the image of Jesus.
This means you learn to love what he loves, hate what he hates, feel what he feels, see how he sees, want what he wants, respond how he responded, and become like him.

As Richard Foster notes. 
"The aim is not external conformity, whether to doctrine or deed, but the re-formation of the inner self—of the spiritual core, the place of thought and feeling, of will and character. ‘Behold,’ cries the psalmist, ‘you desire truth in the inward being; therefore teach me wisdom in my secret heart... Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me’ (Ps. 51:6,10). It is the ‘inner person’ that ‘is being renewed day by day’ (2 Cor. 4:16)."

Jesus is the only one worthy of imitation and devotion. He is the greatest man who has ever lived. No one in all of history has integrated strength and tenderness, courage and compassion, anger and love like Jesus. No one has shown power and restraint, love for the individual, and critique of systems like him. He creates space for redemption in the midst of despair, hope for the future in heartbreaking failure, and vision of another kingdom big enough to give your life to.

Jesus longs to lead you out of the shadows of your shameful and sinful self and invite you into a journey of being renewed in his image. Learn how to see what God has for you and pay attention to how he is shaping you. Surrender to the Spirit as your inner life, thoughts, emotions and will become like Jesus and lead you to respond, act, move and love like Christ in the world.

This is not outward conformity and religious performance.
This is not cultural conformity to its values and practices.
This is deep inner formation into the image of Jesus.

Fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith.
Set your heart on things above where Christ is seated at the right hand of God.
Put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.

Isn’t it life-giving to know you don’t have to perform a masculine identity like some kind of cultural costume to be deeply loved and accepted by God?

God is committed to forming you into the image of Jesus.

This is the beginning of all transformation for a man - learning to become like the most compelling one who has ever lived. 

You are well on your way.

Cheers.

Jon.